


The Last Goodbye?

by StellanFan (yankeetooter), yankeetooter



Category: Chernobyl (TV 2019)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-30
Updated: 2019-09-12
Packaged: 2020-09-30 18:45:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 8,755
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20451827
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yankeetooter/pseuds/StellanFan, https://archiveofourown.org/users/yankeetooter/pseuds/yankeetooter
Summary: In this slight variation, Boris does not stand idly by with tears in his eyes.





	1. Chapter 1

Boris and Ulana watched from a distance as Valery was brought out by the KGB from the back door. There was a car pulled up near the door, and the men escorting Valery were obviously headed that way.

Valery looked up and locked eyes with Boris for a moment before hanging his head once again. In that brief look, Boris saw no spark, no fight left in his friend. Were they taking him off to be shot? Boris felt tears welling up in his eyes. Ulana was sobbing outright.

_No! I won't let us part like this, no final goodbye or embrace! I won't!_

Boris leapt forward, hearing Ulana's sharp intake of breath and her whispered warning, "Boris, they'll shoot you!"

But he didn't care anymore. They were taking his Valera! The man he had fought alongside of. The man he had constantly argued with. The man, who for one brief moment of bliss he had held in his arms, whose shy smile had been remembered on many a long night since.

Boris saw the KGB agents reaching into their suit jackets. He knew they were going for their guns. But still he closed the distance between him and Valery. Gone was any sense of danger. Gone, for the moment, was any difficulty breathing, although no doubt he'd pay for the exertion later. 

Valery had looked up at the commotion and saw Boris charging towards him. The look on his face was a mixed bag of yearning and fear for Boris. He shook his head, trying to signal Boris to stop this madness, but on Boris came.

Charkov watched as Boris approached. He signaled his agents to pull back a bit, to be on standby, but not draw their weapons. What did he care? Let Boris have his foolish moment. It would only give him further ammunition to use against the Deputy Chairman later.

Boris grabbed Valery and pulled him into a bear hug. "Valera!", he whispered, his voice cracking with barely restrained sobs.

"Boris, they will erase you too! Why are you doing this?" Valery's words belied his actions as his arms clamped onto Boris in a death grip, tears flowing freely down Boris' shirt.

_Erasing? Was that to be Valera's fate? How cruel could Charkov be? Valera may not have been a social butterfly, but to not be able to see and talk with his colleagues, to have all his work totally discredited, to...? _

Boris stopped his thoughts from going down that road. No, if Valera was to be erased, let him share the same fate. What would he care anyway, if he could never see Valery again?

"Valera! I couldn't not say goodbye! You know I will always love you, always remember our time together! I will try to find some way to see you again!" The tears were flowing unchecked down Boris' face now. He didn't care! What did anything matter anyway?

Valery clung desperately to Boris, letting his words be absorbed into his heart.

"Ah, my Borja! I loved you from that first day, when you stood up for me at Chernobyl. Through everything, you were the one who kept me going! I told you earlier that you were the one who mattered most, but I should have added that you were the only one who mattered to me! Please, you must go! I can't stand the thought of you endangering yourself for me. I will hold this last moment in my heart forever, and I will never forget you or stop loving you!"

Boris felt the KGB agents pulling him away from Valery's embrace. He thought briefly of fighting them off. Even now, he could probably take down two or three of them before they shot him. And maybe death was better that losing Valery.

But no, they might take it out on Valery! And he also knew that his being shot would break Valery in two. So he allowed himself to be led away, watched as they put Valery in the car and drove him off, Valery briefly meeting his eyes for another moment before he hung his head and did not look up again.

Boris sank onto a bench after the car had gone out of sight, not far from where he and Valery had sat not even an hour ago talking. It was over. He knew they would spirit Valery away to somewhere Boris would never find him. The KGB were too good at their job.

He was briefly aware of Ulana approaching but she kept some distance between them. He thought she might speak, but she simply stood there watching him for a while before turning silently and walking away. He wanted nothing but to be alone; hopefully she understood that.

It was hours later when Boris stirred. By then the stars were coming out and it was getting cold. Only his aching bones finally convinced him to move. He found his waiting car, the driver looking surprised at his approach. No doubt the man had wondered if he had been arrested too. Still, the man had dutifully waited, not having received directions to the contrary.

Boris endured the long ride home, entered his apartment, removed his shoes and dropped into bed fully clothed. He didn't care about his suit getting wrinkled, or the fact he hadn't eaten lunch or dinner. He simply wanted to find the oblivion of sleep. Anything that would help him forget, if only for a time.


	2. All the Difference in the World

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Such a small action changes Valery's (and Boris') fate.

Well, that was that. The last tape was finished, and all that remained was to put them in the designated spot near the trash bin. From there they would be picked up and, hopefully, distributed to the scientific world.

But would it be enough? Valery wasn't sure. Certainly at the trial those scientists hadn't reacted, not then or later either. So why would they now?

He gave thought to the horrible action he'd considered a few times. His suicide could certainly make a statement. But, no, every time he even played with that idea, the memory of Boris' strong arms around him at the end, Boris telling him he loved him, held him back. And there was still the hope that Boris would find a way to reunite with him, although the chances seemed bleaker than ever. 

The KGB had started out having him stay in his apartment, but perhaps that had been too easy, too accessible. Sooner or later, Boris would have found a way to visit him. Since then, he'd been moved twice, and now he wasn't even totally sure where he was. He had only been allowed to take a few boxes of books, some clothes and Sasha (thank goodness!) each time before being located in a generic, bland apartment.

His piano had been left behind, which had been a devastating blow. It had often been a means of connecting with the past. Many evenings, as he played, his thoughts wandered back to Chernobyl, and it was at those times that his memories of Boris were strongest. But no more.

Now, he wasn't allowed to go further than the trash bin. His food, newspapers from Moscow, everything, was delivered to his door. He had no access to local papers, no doubt because the KGB didn't want him to figure out where he was.

But he had found someone who promised to collect his tapes and disperse them...so there was that hope.

He dropped the tapes off then re-entered his apartment. Another long, lonely evening loomed ahead of him. 

_Oh, Boris, please, find me soon! I can't bear the loneliness much longer!_

_________________________

Three weeks had passed since Valery had left his tapes in the cubby near the trash bin. He knew they had been taken because he had checked two nights later. He had heard no other news since then, though and was nervous.

That next morning he was woken by a loud pounding on his door. His heart leaping in his chest, he staggered out of bed and made his way to the entrance. Dare he hope?

Moments later his hopes were dashed when he opened the door and saw three men who could only be KGB agents. Were they moving him again?!?

But if they were, they didn't have him pack anything, which was alarming. Instead, they waited while he dressed, then escorted him out to the waiting car. Sasha! Would he ever see her again?

Hours later, he was dragged into a warehouse where Charkov waited. This had never happened before. Had they found his tapes? They would shoot him for sure! His only hope was that they would leave Boris out of it, since the two of them had had no contact for almost a year.

"Comrade Legasov, you've been very busy, haven't you?"

Valery stood there with jaw clamped shut. He hoped Charkov wouldn't resort to torture, but either way he refused to acknowledge the tapes. If even some of them had escaped the KGB's grasp, he had to allow time for the scientific community to react.

...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I did it. I ended the chapter like that. Sorry, but more to come soon...


	3. The Sentence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Valery receives notice of where he will live out his days.

"So the man who always has something to respond with is strangely silent?"

Valery seethed inwardly at Charkov's taunts, wanting so badly to come back with a retort. But this time he knew better than to do so. Maybe Boris' good sense had finally rubbed off? He suppressed a small smile at the thought of Boris and closed his eyes, trying to focus on that final embrace, those words uttered in his ear.

So it was that he missed Charkov's slight gesture to his men. He had no warning of the result either as a fist slammed into his stomach. Valery dropped to the floor, writhing in pain. The blows continued for some minutes, until he was just this side of consciousness. Than, another small gesture and the agents dragged him to his feet, Valery reflexively trying to stay doubled up.

Charkov glared at the scientist in front of him, satisfied with his men's handiwork. Legasov had a black eye and blood trickled from his bottom lip. He could barely stand upright and was in obvious pain.

"Perhaps you still hope to be reunited with certain of your friends? You think after all this time they are even still trying to find you? Your friends have more sense than you, Legasov. They don't wish to share the same fate as you. Did you think perhaps that they would somehow foil my agents and me, maybe even whisk you away somewhere? Your friends cared for you when all was well, but do you think they still care?"

Valery stood with eyes clamped shut, fighting not to succumb to despair. He knew the KGB used psychological means to torture their prisoners and Charkov was a master at this. Still, the words hit home.

Had Boris stopped trying to find him? Had he put his own security first? Nevermind that's what Valery would have wanted, hearing such fears expressed so cruelly was like a knife in his gut. It was all he could do to hold back tears.

But no! Boris' arms around him, Boris saying, "I love you, Valera!"...that was real, not the venom pouring from Charkov's mouth. And it was almost as if he could hear Boris' voice whispering to him again, that raspy voice in his ear. 

Valery had almost succeeded in losing himself in the memory when Charkov's men shoved him forward unexpectedly, causing him to nearly stumble into the table Charkov sat at.

"No, I know what you've done, Comrade. Know that some of your tapes have already been recovered and the traitors disposed of." Valery winced hearing of yet more lives he was responsible for. 

"Oh, it's only a matter of time before we find the rest. Perhaps some of the recordings will point back at your friends?"

Valery dared not as so much make eye contact with Charkov, but he knew he had not said anything on the tapes that could be drawn back to Boris. That would be one thing he would always have over Charkov.

"No matter. As of this afternoon, you will be further than ever from your friends. You are being assigned to a work camp in Armenia, for the remainder of your pathetic, lonely life. Oh, you'll be surrounded by others, but you may find their sort is not exactly to your tastes."

Charkov smiled at the devastated look on Valery's face. He had finally found Valery's breaking point.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hang on, my faithful readers! Like Valery still hearing Boris' voice, hope is still alive!


	4. The Camp

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Valery is introduced to his new home, and it's not pleasant.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know that much about USSR work camps in the late '80's, but I'm guessing they weren't pleasant.

Charkov turned to go after pronouncing Valery's sentence.

“Nothing to say in parting, Legasov? No quips about what should go on our money? No? Enjoy Armenia then. Oh? And your cat? Of course I’ll be happy to care for her in your absence.”.

With those words Charkov smiled at him and left the room. And Valery fell to his knees, the tears flowing freely now.

____________________

Valery never even got to go back to his apartment. A change of his clothes was brought to him, but nothing else. No books, no notes, none of his poetry, and, of course, no Sasha.

When he questioned the one change of clothes, he was told he wouldn't need any clothes anyway, that he would be given a uniform at the work camp.

And Sasha! He started to ask when Charkov would be picking her up (despite knowing how the question would be received), but all he got were sneers in return. For all he knew, Charkov might never collect her. Or, worse yet, he might collect her than drop her off somewhere in the wild. He'd probably never see Sasha again, but he hated the thought of her outside, helpless and starving.

He was driven to a police station where a short while later he was put on a bus headed to Armenia. The guards handcuffed him to the seat back, same as the other passengers... handcuffed! Valery seethed for hours over the insult, but there was no one to complain to and it probably wouldn't have been wise to do so anyway.

The twenty-seven hour bus ride was hell. Stops for the bathroom were infrequent and the options were using the disgusting one on the bus, which apparently hadn't been clean since the bus was new, or going outside in the bushes, where a guard stood maybe a foot away and leered the whole time. Valery would have gone with the first option but as soon as he got near the facilities at the back of the bus, he felt his stomach starting to rebel at the smell. So outside it was.

Meals were twice a day and disgusting. Valery's digestion had never been good even before Chernobyl. Now, on a constantly jouncing bus, he could barely keep anything down.

And, oh, what he wouldn't give for a cigarette! His withdrawal got so bad that he leaned towards any guard nearby who was smoking, hoping to inhale some of the secondhand smoke.

Sleeping...hah! Not possible.

The only way he got through the long trip was by thinking of Boris. The embrace, his last words to Valery, and, Valery actually smiled a little to think of it, picturing Boris coming on the bus and finding him handcuffed. Boris would charge down the aisle, knocking aside anyone who got in his way, and tear the seats out of the floor to free Valery! The very thought sustained Valery.

______________________

They arrived at the work camp at three in the morning. An oversized and not too clean uniform was thrust at Valery and he was shown to a barracks with one remaining cot. Exhausted, he dropped into the cot and was asleep almost instantly. Three hours later he was kicked out of bed by a guard.

"You have five minutes left to get your breakfast before work detail begins for the day!" the guard snarled at him.

Valery ran to the mess tent and just managed to grab the last hard biscuit before being shoved into line. The biscuit tasted bland and Valery thought he might break a tooth off trying to eat it.

Work turned out to be digging in the local coal mine. After an hour, he thought he might collapse and die on the spot. Soft hands that had only ever done the work of a scientist were bleeding and sore in no time. His glasses were coated in grime and practically useless. And the heat! Valery would have given anything for a glass of cold water, but they only got one twenty minute break at lunchtime, which involved a small cup of warm water, tasteless stew, and another of the infamous biscuits. 

Halfway through his meal, a hard shove from behind made him spill the rest of his meal. He turned around to see his assailant and blanched in fear. The man behind him was a bulk of muscle, and almost as tall as Boris. 

"You gotta problem, runt?" the man scowled, moving even closer to Valery and brandishing his fist threateningly. Valery shook his head and looked down. 

_Please go away! Please don't hurt me!_

When Valery dared look up again, the man had gone, thankfully, but he couldn't stop looking over his shoulder for the next hour. 

The afternoon was worse. He was that much more exhausted and the heat was worse than in the morning. Valery began to wish he could work naked like Glukov's men at Chernobyl, but that probably wouldn't be such a good idea here.

By the time they returned to camp, it was all he could do to eat a bit of dinner, then collapse on his cot. Hours later he awoke. There was someone lying next to him!

A dirty hand groped him all over. He struggled to get away, but his molester was much stronger than he was and it was no use.

"Aw, c'mon pretty boy! You look like you'd enjoy a little fun, eh? And if it's not me, it'll be somebody else another night! So whatya say?"

Valery shuddered and shook his head. His would-be wooer kicked him hard in the back and growled, "Fine! But you'll be sorry you didn't take what was offered! And some night we're going to go at it, whether you're willing or not!"

Valery literally shook for the next hour, terrified the man would return. If only Boris was here, he'd make short work of the guy! But he was alone, so alone. Eventually, he sobbed himself to sleep, only to be awakened a few hours later to face another hellish day.

And so it was for the next six months. Gradually, Valery's hands toughened up so they didn't bleed from the hard labor. He learned to fall asleep quickly, to try and get as much rest as possible, although he dreaded waking up to another guy in his bed. But the other inmates had decided that there were others who were more entertaining in the sack, so instead they made Valery their punching bag. All day long he was constantly tripped and shoved. The already clumsy scientist became even more jumpy, never knowing where an assault would come from next.

If there was a problem with their work, he was blamed. The inmates received a ration of cigarettes once a week, but his always disappeared into others' hands. He was not left to eat in peace, and dared not take a shower. The first time he had got the nerve to, one of the inmates stole his uniform, and he had to walk to the guard's office to get another one stark naked, except for a small towel, while all around him catcalls and laughter rang out.

All this began to take it's toll. More and more he found himself thinking about suicide. After all, he was never going to see Boris again, that was certain, so why go on like this?

One night in particular, he was contemplating how he might pull it off the next day. Finally he fell asleep, and had a very vivid dream.

It was after the trial once again. Boris came charging up to him, defiant of the KGB. Once again Boris held him, and it was like he was really there. Once again, Boris murmured "I love you, Valera!" in his ear. And then he woke up, the moon still feebly shining outside.

_Oh, Boris, how can I go on? Life is unbearable here, and I can't deal with not having you in my life!_

Finally, shortly before dawn, he fell back asleep, yearning to revisit that lifelike dream.

The next day he had just left the mine with a cart full if debris when the ground began shaking violently. 

Earthquake? Oh, no! Even as he lost his balance and fell, he watched in horror as the mine entrance collapsed, the distant screams of trapped men slowly growing fainter. He crawled toward the mine entrance (or where it had been, rather) and began desperately clawing at the dirt with his bare hands, no shovels in sight. But it was no use. Tons of dirt and rocks had condemned dozens of unlucky workers to death. Valery collapsed in despair on the ground as the shaking gradually subsided.


	5. A Missed Opportunity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Renewed happiness is so close, but keeps slipping through the fingers.

Deputy Chairman Shcherbina arrived at work Monday morning, relatively well rested despite a weekend spent trying to track down Valery. The damned KGB had moved him again, and just when his sources had almost pinpointed his location! Boris clenched his fists in frustration. He had to find Valery! He had made a promise!

His secretary Natasha greeted him with a fresh cup of coffee. "General Secretary Gorbachev wants to see you in his office at 9:30 sharp." Boris nodded distractedly, looking over the headlines of the Moscow newspaper.

What? There'd been an earthquake in Spitak, in Armenia! The paper said there had been numerous deaths , but that the death toll had not yet been determined, the earthquake having happened only the evening before.

Boris held his head in his hands. Visions of Chernobyl came back vividly. Men dying, and more men being sent to their deaths by him and Valery and Moscow. And now this! Would the deaths never stop?

Slowly Boris recovered and rallied himself. The meeting was soon, so he better get over to Gorbachev's office.

_____________________

When he entered, he was greeted warmly by the General Secretary, who asked about how his health was. "It's as well as is to be expected." Boris replied, while glaring at the third man in the room. Deputy Chairman of the KGB, Charkov was the last man Boris wanted to see. Why did he even need to be here?

Boris sat down and accepted a glass of vodka from Gorbachev, still eyeing Charkov sourly.

"Boris, have you seen the headlines this morning?"

"Yes, the earthquake in Spitak." Boris shook his head in regret.

"Yes, well, that's why I wanted to see you. You know we were very pleased with the job you did at Chernobyl..."

Boris gritted his teeth, just barely resisting the urge to throw Gorbachev's phone across the room.

_That wasn't me, that was Valery! And all you would approve for him was a watch! How dare you?! And now he's condemned to a life of loneliness, and all because he dared to tell the truth!_

Slowly Boris regained his composure, a hint of hostility lingering in his eyes. Gorbachev either didn't notice the smouldering rage in his eyes, or knew better than to address it.

"Well, Boris, I would really like you to consider going out there and overseeing the cleanup efforts."

Boris considered. Despite his anger with Gorbachev, his heart went out to all the victims in Spitak, and he wanted to do all he could to help them. But his health was touchy, and going out there would mean being away from Moscow's best doctor's.

Charkov chose that moment to speak up, an alarmed look on his face. "General Secretary, perhaps Deputy Chairman Shcherbina's health is such that he should stay in Moscow. He needs regular care."

_What?! Since when did Charkov give two rubles about his health? What was he up to?_

That made up his mind. Boris stood. "General Secretary, I shall consider it an honor and a pleasure to serve the USSR in this matter."

"Thank you, Boris! You can leave tonight on a flight out there. General Tarakanov will be accompanying you to assist in overseeing the military. And of course, whatever you might need, just let me know as the need arises."

Boris nodded. Tarakanov! Good man! He glanced at Charkov on the way out and took a lot of satisfaction in the look of concealed rage on his face. Angry Charkov always cheered him up.

_________________

_***the evening before***_

Valery picked himself up out of the dirt in front of the mine entrance. He wearily made his way back to the camp, where all was chaos. Finding the mainly intact mess tent he grabbed some dinner. After eating, during which his mind raced the whole time, he found an almost empty tent, claimed a spare cot, and dropped into it exhaustedly. Most of that night he lay awake, haunted by thoughts of Chernobyl. All the deaths, and it was happening again!

The next morning, there was no guard to kick him out of bed. After procuring some breakfast, Valery found an area where the wreckage was particularly bad, a group of residences down a steep hill from the camp. He went from house to house, listening for any cries for help, digging wherever there might be survivors trapped. The work was hard, and his progress slow, but he refused to stop and rest. People might be slowly dying under the debris and any delay might mean more deaths! 

In no time at all, he was covered in dust, dirt and grime. Valery Legasov was, to all appearances, just another worker in the desolate aftermath of the earthquake.

______________

Boris rose from the cot slowly, his back letting him know in no uncertain terms how it felt about the accommodations. Tarakanov and he had arrived around midnight last night and gone to bed almost right away. They would need daylight before they could assess the damage properly and make a plan.

Tarakanov and he talked over breakfast, then set off in opposite directions to survey the damage. Their plan was to reconvene three hours later over lunch and relay to each other what they had found. They would also talk to any workers already involved in rescues, to see where extra manpower should be sent.

______________

Valery continued digging, growing ever more tired with time. The sun beat down relentlessly and he knew he should stop for water soon, but he hated to take time away from digging when each delay could mean someone else drawing their last breath. Sweat dripped into his eyes, making it harder to see. So it was that he missed the pipe sticking out of the ground and went sprawling. His glasses flew off and landed some distance away. But where?

_______________

Boris stopped at the top of a steep hill to talk to some guards who were standing around. Down at the bottom of the hill, a lone worker, dirty and grimy, staggered among the wreckage.

"What's down there?" he asked the guards.

They answered with nonchalant shrugs. "Some homes of local villagers."

Boris lost it upon hearing this. "And you have one lone man working down there? Are you stupid or just lazy? There could be any number of people trapped down there! Go gather up as many men as you can and get down there ASAP, or I'll have you shot!"

The men, cowed, ran off to muster up help. Boris stood there for some minutes, shaking with rage.

_____________

Valery, scrambling around looking for his glasses, suddenly stopped dead. That voice! It could only be one man...Boris! But where? He listened again. Yes, that was his Boris, threatening to shoot people. Despite the threat directed at the men, a smile crept across Valery's face.

Boris was here! But, why? Oh, of course! They must have sent him to oversee the cleanup. And now they could be reunited! Oh, wouldn't Charkov be furious at this turn of events!

But now the problem became obvious. Valery couldn't see three feet in front of him without his glasses. And being in a hollow made it harder to figure out from what direction Boris' voice was coming.

_Keep shouting, Boris! I'm trying to find you! _

But the next moment, Boris' shouting stopped, and any slight chance of finding him by the sound of his voice was gone. Valery tried shouting himself, hoping to draw Boris to him instead, but hours of work in the dust with no water made his voice come out in a pathetic croak. After a few attempts, Valery gave up, continuing to search for his glasses. If he could find them quickly, he should be able to spot Boris.

______________

Boris stood at the top of the hill a few minutes longer, absentmindedly watching that lone worker, who seemed to be searching for something on the ground. Don't worry, he thought, we'll get you some help soon. Then turning, he walked back towards camp. It was almost time to meet with Tarakanov.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much, faithful readers! I am really not a sadistic person, so please don't think so after having read this chapter.


	6. At Last

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Fates may be fickle with Boris and Valery, but they won't be forever.

Valery finally found his glasses, but by then Boris was not to be found. Valery grabbed a quick meal, but only because he had gone into camp to try and look for Boris and then decided he had better eat.

After lunch he thought he would ask around after Boris. After all, tall imposing figures with steely blue eyes and silver hair couldn't be all that common, could they? But the moment he stepped out of the mess tent, he was rounded up by a couple of guards who were gathering men to go dig in the ruins. Valery tried to protest that he needed to find the Deputy Chairman in charge of the operation, but the guards just sneered at him and accused him of trying to get out of work.

Pretty soon Valery found himself back at the same site as the day before, digging through wreckage and looking for survivors. At least he had more help today. But as the day waned and the light faded, no survivors had yet been found. They had found plenty of bodies, though, and every time they dug another one up, Valery wanted to go off somewhere and weep in frustration.

The sun set and the others wandered back to camp. Valery sat on a mound of debris, at the end of his strength. He still didn't know where Boris was. What if he had returned to Moscow and wouldn't be back now that he had surveyed the damage? What if that chance earlier had been the only one he would ever have? Boris certainly couldn't have known Valery was here, or he would have left no stone unturned until he found him. Boris, in fact, was the only one who cared that Valery was still alive.

And the dead?! Body after body, countless lives lost in one quick moment. It was all too much to bear!

Just as Valery was getting up to go, the chill starting to seep into his bones, he heard a tiny sound from nearby. He listened a few minutes until he had better honed in on the sound, then began digging frantically. About six inches down was a small hole framed by rubble from which the sound was emanating.

Valery widened the hole and out crawled a tiny kitten. She was very dirty and her fur was matted, but otherwise seemed okay. She mewed repeatedly and came over to Valery without fear, settling in his lap. She protested when he got up to walk back to camp, but settled into the crook of his arm a moment later, purring contentedly.

Valery collected dinner for himself and his new friend, then went back to the tent where he had slept last night. He fashioned a little bed out of extra blankets for the little kitten, then laid down beside her.

"What should I call you, I wonder? You are one of my only two friends I have left in the world. I'll call you Hope!"

The kitten looked at him a moment, then went back to her meticulous bathing. But when Valery laid his head down to go to sleep, she came and laid down on his shoulder. The last thing Valery heard as he drifted off was her incessant purring. He didn't have any nightmares that night.

_________________

Late that night, Boris took a phone call from Moscow. It was one of his contacts who had been helping him look for Valery.

"Deputy Chairman Shcherbina?"

"Yes?"

"Those supplies you've been looking for for awhile?". Boris' heart skipped a beat. Of course they spoke in code when they conversed. 

"Well, it seems, amazingly enough, that your supplies ended up in Spitak a while back, long before the earthquake. So, all you would need to do is locate them. Hopefully, they weren't damaged."

"Of course. Thank you.". Boris hung up and sank into a chair. Valery was here? And had been for a while? So that's why Charkov had been protesting his coming here! But...the realization hit Boris like a brick. If Valery had been here for a while, then he might have been killed in the earthquake! No!! It couldn't be! Not after all this time of looking for him!

Boris went charging out of the tent, ready to start digging right then and there. But where to even begin? He almost ran head-on into Tarakanov, who, like Boris, kept long hours.

"Boris! Are you alright?". Boris pulled Tarakanov aside and told him everything. It was a risk, but Tarakanov had always been a staunch supporter of Valery, even protesting when the party refused to give Valery an award for his work. He needed an ally, damnit!

Tarakanov looked grim. "Okay, Boris. Valery might be okay. It's a big place. I'll check the medical tent and ask around some more. But, Boris? You can't go out looking tonight! The ground is unstable in places. It could be dangerous!"

Boris ground his teeth in frustration. Tarakanov, as usual, was right, but what if Valery was buried somewhere, taking his last few breaths? He stalked to his tent, raging at his inability to do anything before dawn.

_________________

Valery woke very early. He was determined to look for Boris this morning before being put in a work group once again. It was still barely light, so he stayed in bed for a little bit, snuggling with Hope.

Hope suddenly jumped up and arched her back, all her fur standing on end. When Valery tried to comfort her, she hissed at him and then ran towards the tent exit. Valery had just stood up to go and retrieve her when the ground started violently shaking again. He was knocked to his feet and before he could get up again, the rafters of the barracks collapsed, pinning him to the ground.

It was some hours before he came to. He tried to lift the beams off of his body, but he couldn't get any leverage. Pain shot through his side when he tried to move and even breathing hurt. Outside, the sounds of men hurrying about reached him; the camp was in an uproar after the aftershock. From a distance away, he heard Boris barking orders at everyone. Boris! But he couldn't get enough air in his lungs to yell out.

_________________

Boris was beside himself. Many of the camp structures that had survived the original earthquake had fallen with the latest aftershock. Men were hard at work digging their comrades out, but already they had found some men who hadnt survived. And despite all this, the only thing in Boris' mind was where Valery could be.

Walking along in a state of shock, Boris saw a tiny kitten pawing at a pile of rubble and constantly mewing. The rubble looked to have been a barracks tent at one time. 

Boris had never really liked cats before he met Valery, but now he saw them in a new light. Any creature that could win a stubborn and absent-minded scientist's attention had to be pretty remarkable. So Boris approached the cat carefully and picked it up.

"This is no place for you, little one. You could get hurt!". But this cat was having nothing to do with Boris. Scratching at him until he dropped her, Hope ran back to the wreckage and began pawing at it again. Boris, puzzled, called a guard over.

"Was this a barracks before it collapsed?" he barked at the man. When the guard nodded, Boris said, "Was it being used?"

The guard thought a moment. "Before the earthquake, there was a whole group of men using it. Since then? Not really... although I thought I saw one guy going in there last night. I think he had a kitten with him, of all things!"

Boris pointed to the cat. The man looked where Boris indicated and said, "Why yes, that's the very one! How about that?"

The next moment Boris was calling to every man within shouting distance to come and remove the barracks wreckage. Tarakanov came up to see what the commotion was and found Boris bent over in pain, his face pale and clutching his chest.

"Boris? Boris!!"

Boris Shcherbina felt his vision narrowing to nothing. Pain had exploded in his chest and he felt dizzy. He was aware of medics surrounding him, making him lie down, and then he lost consciousness.

______________

When he awoke next, he was in bed, in some medical facility. They've taken me back to Moscow! was his first thought. But had they found Valery? 

But, no, there was Tarakanov, sitting on the edge of his bed. Boris went to sit up, but Tarakanov gently pushed him down again. 

"Valery?" Boris managed to croak out.

"Boris. It's only been two hours since you collapsed. The men are still removing the debris. We can't use machinery because if Valery is under there, he could be further hurt. You might say we're using biorobots, eh?" Tarakanov offered up a half smile, trying to get Boris to relax.

Boris groaned and tried to get up. "Then you need all the biorobots you can get!"

"Boris! Absolutely not! Your heart almost gave out for good back there! You cannot get out of bed! And Boris," this more gently, "we don't even know if Valery was in there."

Boris' face crumpled at that. He knew in his heart he needed to stay in bed, but he also was certain Valery was in that wreckage. It all made sense. Valery was the only person who would think to befriend a cat at a disaster site. The guard had seen a man going into the tent last night with a cat. And then that same kitten had been trying to get to someone in the tent after the aftershock.

"Tarakanov, I know he's in there!"

"But you need to stay in bed regardless!"

"But the cat!"

"Oh, well, speaking of that. Here's how you can help." Tarakanov produced the kitten from his pocket and placed in on Boris' chest. "She keeps trying to dig in the wreckage, and has almost been stepped on several times by the men."

Boris raised an eyebrow at Tarakanov. "You want me to watch a cat? That's how I'm to help?". He glared at the kitten, who simply started kneading him and purring.

"Yes! That's the only way you can help right now. Look at it this way. How would Valery feel if he got rescued and his kitten got hurt?" Another scowl from Boris. "Fine! More importantly, when we do find Valery, how do you think he would react to know you had a heart attack trying to save him? He would never forgive himself!"

Boris nodded, resigned to resting. 

_You win, Tarakanov. I know it would kill Valery to know he had been the cause of my death. _

Satisfied, Tarakanov got up to return to the worksite. He hadn't wanted to play that last card, but there had been no other way.

Meanwhile, Boris glared at the little kitten on his chest, who looked back at him sweetly.

"What!?" he snarled at the cat. But little Hope, very much alive, walked up and touched noses with Boris, then, returning to his chest, curled up and fell asleep, still purring like a little motor.

Boris tried to stay awake, but he had met his match. Soon he was snoring quietly in counterpart to Hope's purring.

_______________

Valery lay under the beams, drifting in and out of consciousness. His side and right leg hurt horribly. But every time he came around, the sounds of men digging got closer and closer. He laid there patiently, feeling more hopeful now that he would be rescued. He drifted off again, his last thought that of Boris, and whether or not he was okay.

____________

Hours later, the men found and extricated Valery from the wreckage, placing him on a stretcher. A medic examined him, and determined that his right leg was most likely broken as well as several ribs, although they wouldn't be certain until he'd had his leg and chest x-rayed back in Moscow.

Men carefully carried him to the medical tent where he was laid in the bed next to Boris', who slept obliviously on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, do I love cats! Also, Tarakanov. ☺️


	7. Recuperating (Body, Heart and Soul)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Boris and Valery are both in bad shape, but they also are better than they've been in a long time.

Boris woke up after a good six hours of sleep. The close call with his heart and the days of stress had finally teamed up to put him under. He found he had no desire to move either.

A horrible dread had settled on his heart. He didn't know exactly how long he'd slept, but it was getting dark outside. Surely they had finished removing the wreckage of the barracks by now. And if they'd found Valery...he could barely even voice it in his mind ...if Valery had been okay, been alive...the tears were threatening now... wouldn't they have roused him?

Seeking any form of distraction, he noticed the kitten was gone. Oh no, had she got away? He roused himself enough to sit up, and then he saw the man lying beside him in the next cot.

The man's leg was in a cast and he had a bandage around his head. And sitting on his chest was the kitten! That little minx! So much for loyalty!

Huffing, Boris looked closer, rubbing at his eyes. His vision was a bit blurry with exhaustion, something that happened sometimes with age (and maybe another side effect of all the radiation he had been exposed to at Chernobyl).

The next moment he was sitting beside the sleeping man. Valery? Was he dreaming? No, he was awake. The cold floor under his bare feet convinced him of that. But his Valera was hurt?

He was bent over Valery, looking at him concernedly, when Valery opened his eyes. 

"Boris!" Valery exclaimed, beaming with joy. The next moment Boris engulfed him in a bear hug, but quickly drew back when Valery flinched.

"What is it, Valera?" Valery pulled his shirt up to reveal his bandaged ribs. At Boris' stricken look, he patted his arm reassuringly. 

"It's okay. You didn't hurt me, Borya. We just need to take it easy for a bit."

Boris looked skeptical, still convinced he had somehow broken Valery, but at last relaxed. For the next few hours, they caught each other up on all that had happened since that fateful day. Boris described the frustration of the KGB always somehow staying one step ahead of him as he tried to find Valery's latest location.

Tears of joy sprang into Valery's eyes when Boris related how he had gone to his last known apartment, only to find one very unhappy, but still very much alive, Sasha. It seemed Charkov had simply left her to starve, but Boris had found her before it was too late.

"She's staying with my neighbor now, who loves cats. She'll take good care of her. She practically ate a quarter of a chicken that first night I found her!"

Valery didn't know whether to laugh or cry at this, so he managed to do both at the same time. 

When Valery told Boris about dropping his glasses and then hearing Boris' voice from a distance away, Boris shook his head disgustedly. "I saw you, Valera! Except I didn't know it was you! If only I'd taken a few minutes to walk down the hill and talk to you, we would have found each other right then!"

"There's no fretting over it now, Boris. Things have worked out okay as it turned out."

"Except you got hurt, Valera! Maybe that wouldn't have happened!"

"Or maybe I would have been killed, Borya. There's no telling where I might have been during that last aftershock if we had already been reunited."

Boris had to agree with Valery's logic. Suddenly, Valery's face lit up all over again, and Boris turned to see Tarakanov approaching. Tarakanov clasped hands warmly with each of them in turn, then turned to Boris sternly.

"Did you tell him, Boris?" Boris glared at Tarakanov. 

"What? He needs to know, Boris."

When Valery looked at Tarakanov, puzzled and concerned, the general explained how Boris had collapsed. "It was his heart. The doctor said he should be fine, but needs to avoid any stress as much as possible, and take his medication."

Tarakanov didn't like betraying Boris' trust, but he knew the only one who could make certain Boris followed the doctor's orders was Valery.

Boris glared at Tarakanov for another minute, then his expression became one of grudging surrender.

"I'll make sure he rests," Valery said quietly but determinedly. Tarakanov nodded, satisfied, then left to give the two their privacy. The next moment Valery had carefully shifted in bed so he sat closer to Boris, then cupped his face in his hands.

"Borya... Please don't ever nearly leave me again! You've got to take care of yourself!" he pleaded.

Boris looked in Valery's eyes and nodded. He knew Valery was talking about him collapsing, and nothing else.

The next moment, Hope nuzzled between the two of them, mewing for attention. ",Oh, Hope!" Valery exclaimed. "You're okay!"

Boris raised an eyebrow, then smiled. "Hope, Valera? Yes, I suppose that's very fitting!". He went on to tell Valery how Hope had led him to figure out that Valery was trapped in the debris. Then, how she had stayed and slept with him after his attack.

Valery beamed, cuddling Hope under his chin. "She's our guardian, Borya! She's been working to protect us and bring us together all this time!"

The doctor came by at that moment and ordered them both to get some sleep. He waited until both were back in their beds before leaving, but once he was out of hearing, Boris got up and moved their two cots together.

"Tomorrow I'll see about getting us a separate, private room, Valera. I'll even ask Tarakanov to guard it himself if I need to! But for now, I guess we better rest."

Boris had just started drifting off, when he felt Valery's arm snake around him from the back, his hand sliding up Boris' nightshirt to rest on the bare skin of Boris' chest.

"I did so miss you, Borya!" Valery mumbled as they both slipped into the best sleep they'd had since Chernobyl.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The story's not finished yet, but I know everybody's been clamoring for Boris and Valery's reunion, so I made this chapter all about that.
> 
> Next chapter, the two recuperate together, helping each other through the challenges that brings.


	8. Getting Reacquainted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Valery and Boris have some well-deserved time to themselves while they heal.

Boris woke to the welcome feel of Valery's arm wrapped around him. Hearing someone approaching, he quickly sat up and shook Valery awake. As it turned out, it was just Tarakanov, smiling as he walked up.

Boris explained his need to Tarakanov: a room where they could get rest without being disturbed, preferably guarded by someone Tarakanov could trust. After all, Valery needed to recuperate fully before the KGB tried to put him back to work.

"Are you going to allow that to happen, Boris?"

Boris gave Valery a tender look. "Not if I have any say in the matter!" he growled.

"I'll take care of it myself then," Tarakanov declared, and I know a trusted doctor who will prescribe the maximum time for recovery, for both of you."

Boris nodded his thanks, grateful, as always for Tarakanov's loyalty and understanding. "Also, if you could handle all decisions as much as is possible, I would appreciate it."

"Of course, Boris." 

A few hours later Boris and Valery were in a room off the main medical complex. The door had a lock and they had their own bathroom with shower. They might be out in the country, in the midst of a lot of wreckage, but Boris thought he had never been so happy with his accommodations. Of course the presence of one ginger haired scientist had definitely biased his view.

Valery, clumsy at the best of times, seemed determined to break his other leg. Hobbling around on his crutches, he managed to fall several times, until finally Boris had had enough.

"Alright, Valery, let me," Boris said, approaching his friend. Valery had been headed for the bathroom, but it would be night before he made it there. Boris wrapped his arm around Valery's waist on his uninjured side, almost tucking him under his shoulder. Then, with very little effort from Valery, he propelled them both to the bathroom. Once there, he stood behind Valery while he used the toilet, supporting him with his hands on his waist.

Valery's balance overall was worse than it had ever been and Boris couldn't figure it out. But months of malnutrition and backbreaking work had taken a toll on his friend and , between that and his injuries, Valery was in bad shape.

So Boris took charge of his friend. He helped Valery shave, and since Valery couldn't shower because of his bandages and cast, Boris came up with a solution.

Valery was laying in bed after eating breakfast when Boris approached with a basin of warm water, soap, and several washclothes.

"Boris, what's that for?"

"I am going to give you a sponge bath, Valera!"

"What?! No, you don't need to do that! I can..."

Boris picked up one of Valery's bare feet and displayed its dirty surface, his eyebrows making a definitive statement. Valery blushed.

"They only allowed us one two minute shower a week," he explained defensively, "and after the earthquake..."

Boris reached out and ran his hand through Valery's hair. "I know, Valerka, but now we can put things to right."

So, despite Valery's protests, Boris began bathing him. Since they were the dirtiest, Boris washed his feet first, scrubbing away to get all the dirt off. This proved problematic however, as the moment he started, Valery started squirming and giggling.

"Oh, Valera, you and your ticklish feet!" Boris didn't let up though, much to Valery's dismay. Finally, his feet were clean and Boris moved on after refilling the basins with clean water. Boris left no inch of unbandaged skin unscrubbed. When he reached Valery's shorts and raised an eyebrow in question, Valery turned beet red. 

"Boris, I don't know..."

Boris considered. He felt himself responding to the thought of washing Valery there, but his heart had also started beating rather hard, so...

"Okay, Valera, maybe we better both wait."

Valera looked at his friend who was suddenly pale. "Borja, are you okay?"

Boris nodded, despite not being too sure himself. Damn his weak body! Would it always be this way? But no, the doctor said he was getting stronger every day, so he just needed to be patient. He sat quietly, feeling his breathing and heart rate slowly return to normal.

Valery, not sure what had happened, sat next to Boris rubbing his back. With the touch of Valery's hands, he felt himself relaxing more, to the point of wanting to rest for awhile.

"Lie down for a bit, Borja." Valery ordered. 

Boris protested. "I haven't washed your hair yet."

"And that sounds wonderful, but we can do it later. Now relax.". Boris couldn't argue with Valery. His hands were running up and down Boris' bare back, Boris' shirt having been discarded. He sighed, feeling every part of his body lose its tension. Gradually, he drifted off. Once he heard Boris snoring, Valery pulled the covers up over him. Then, stretching out next to his friend, he nestled up against Boris and fell asleep himself.


End file.
